The Stuff We Can't Fit In Somewhere Else in Burnham on Crouch, Essex*

The things which can't be categorised

You can tell us more about Burnham on Crouch.

• please mention sun god and mushers, they are massive local legends
• please mention sun god and mushers, they are massive local legends
• visitors from southminster! all the little chavs
• Re-knowned for it's swinging days back in the 60's. The residents were so bored in Burnham that they used to have 'Put your car keys in the middle' nights at each others houses. Produced some strange children!! They don't know who their real fathers and siblings are!!
• The listing for the Ostend George pub is incorrect Pinchos is now at that address
• Car for sale round wheels, see through windows, opening doors much inhabited goes like a song swap for rabbit hutch or why ha ha said he clown!
• I don't know where you get your information about hotels from, but although Burnham might be 7 miles from Southend as the crow flies, I think you'll find its a hell of a lot longer if you had to drive - try 30 miles!!!!!!!!
• What the f**k is a wooba?
• What is Burnham Week all about? A few yachties come down to race their boats and all of a sudden the corpses of Burnham decide to party for a week - nothing else happens in the town for the rest of the year - a few youngsters have one too many shandy's and end up fighting the world! Forget about it, along with the Carnival and the Music Festival (if you can call it that) - councellors of Burham - talk to your people - find out what they want...i'm sure its not Mr Smith on his tamborine and some ugly minger dressed up as carnival queen, representing the people of Burnham! - Where do the judges find these girls?
• If you want to learn to sail or get some miles in try www.burnhamsailing.com
• New for Old :- Shops going out of business and their owners recreating their shops into houses. Burnham will finish up like a very quiet Saxon Hamlet with little going on.
• It is TEN bends not nine! (Most of us can't count though so don't worry)
• We don't care.
• JUST LIKE TO SAY, THAT THE BEST PEOPLE IN BURNHAM MOST BE SIDNEY GAMBLE AND JOANY GAMBLE, THAY ARE THE BEST PARENTS TO DAVID, GRAYHAM, JACKIE AND CHRISTINE! THAY HAVE BEEN TOGETHER OVER 50 YRS AND HAVE LOTS AND LOTS OF GRAND CHILDREN, WHO ALL THEM THEM BOTH DERALY, ALL OUR LOVE THE GAMBLES WE LOVE YOU!
• Please remove myself from the local heroes section (Jonathan Moorfoot), If you could let me know who sent in the details I would be very grateful.
• Burnham is infamous for its series of 9 bends to get to it on the way to the cafe of course,
• WHO in the hell wrote all that stuff about Nick Clapham in Burnham On crouch, he is a top bloke
• Top Notch Karate club - won the Essex trophy last year !
• There are a lot of people with surname Duck in this town, none with the first name Donald though.
• Its True, the woobas do cause a fire risk, its also annoying in the summer when they walk out in front of you on country roads and you cant avoid them , do u just his them.
• There have actually been three great fires of Burnham, the last one started in the bus shelter and the fumes from burning puffa jackets caused the town to be evacuated for several days, it was found on return that the woobas in the shelter had remained there throughout the conflagration as they were 'hard'
• There is a secret passage behind Tescos that leads to the railway
• There's an Aikido Club starting at the Sports Centre in May. Only trouble is its on a Sunday morning from 10-12. Won't help my hangover!!!!

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Last updated: 2008-10-14