The Knowhere Guide

The Stuff We Can't Fit In Somewhere Else in Calne, Wiltshire*

The things which can't be categorised

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  • calne really is so beautiful and crime does not exist it has the fittest chavs in existance- yeah whatever (but is has very pretty girls-no jokes!)
  • I have lived in Calne for 7 years. I am now living in London. I,as a teenager, have to say that I will NEVER go back.It is a rubbish dump, sooooooooo boring and lots of thiefs etc.
  • the legend of the Harris factory and its name still lives on! Twins at st marys are called harris and they certainly like their pigs....
  • Is Calne really as bad as is made out in the Knowhere pages? I lived there with my family from 1991 to 1996 (pre-Sainsburys if anyone remembers those days) and only moved away because of work (or lack of it). Apart from the lack of facilities and shops, I don't remember it as being a bad place, but reading the comments here hardly anyone has anything nice to say about it now. What a pity.
  • Thanks for all the FULCRUM credits, one day we will get it together again. Viva le Milllllaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!
  • why do the residents of calne insist on throwing eggs etc at St. mary's pupils........ it's not funny or clever we dont wanna be there ne more tan you want us
  • There is a Deeply Rooted 'meeting' on the 29th May. Any Christian youth can come. Meet in the Gospel Hall @ about 7.oopm
  • Calne has gone from bad to worse coz of all the druggies
  • So, I hear the Queen is coming to Calne??? poor woman! Is she going to open the new library? if so, will it be finished???
  • Good commuter belt, with lots of new housing, and nearby Bath, Bristol & Swindon.
  • Calne is, in my opinion, the most desperate waste of a few square miles in the whole of northern Europe. I'd rather spend a wet weekend in Merthyr Tydfil than Calne.
  • Calne has improved a bit I suppose, the miller is the centre of youth lovliness and will be that way for ever, I just wish that Mark would stop spitting in your face when you talk to him.
  • If that's Pete Guilfoyle then he's been there forever (well at least since I was there in 1987)
  • best person has to be mr guilfoyle , bentleys history teacher who looks just like carl kenedy from neighbours
  • There will probably be a new Sainsbury's built in Calne by Christmas 1997 on the green where Harris's used to be
  • Probably one of the most backward towns in England. Thirty years ago it was a hateful place, full of the smell of death. A killing field for the pigs of England. The inhabitants of this town walked to work in the Harris bacon factory that smothered the town centre and dominated everything around for miles. The men who worked in the slaughter house wore blank expressions on their faces. As if they had completely switched off from the rather sweet smell of the steaming freshly killed pigs, whose carcasses dripped blood and guts onto the wet concrete floors of the death house.
    The women at that time were a stiff faced lot. No joy, pursed lips, ready to jump down anyone's throat, penny pinching, and never with a good word to say about anyone.
    The factory has gone now, but now the town has a gaping hole in its centre, and looks lost and forlorn. No hustle and bustle up the High Street. There are no teeming throngs of pedestrians wending their way home to dinner.
    No, Calne was and still is, the knowhere place not to be in England.
  • It's not that bad, I lived there for eighteen years and only saw a couple of pigs cop it. The place is o.k. bit backwards, but o.k.
  • I lived in Calne from 1972-80 and cannot imagine the Harris factory gone! I seem to remember a great restaurant up the hill somewhere from the factory and a store that sold home-made mustard. I also remember the great people I met there (some of whom I still keep in touch with).
  • It's a large hodge podge of people from all around except the local area. You will find people from most areas in England. The town is split into 'NORTH' (all those people who used to work in the Harris factory) and 'SOUTH' (all those people who moved into the town from somewhere else and try to make it like the way 'they' want it. I include myself in this category. It's a case of never the twain shall meet.
  • The reason most people live in Calne is because the housing is cheap, and not because of the thriving community spirit or the fantastic amenities.
  • To help improve Calne for the 21st Century North Wilts District Council is planning a new town centre for Calne. It should accommodate most of the empty space left in the centre of Calne, when the pork factory was demolished. It will include a new library, new shops and housing. Calne is a great place to be based for your hols! Ten minutes from the World Heritage Site of Avebury, five minutes from Bowood House, 20 minutes from Marlborough, 40 minutes from Bath, one hour from Salisbury, loads of Golf Clubs, Marlborough Downs, The Ridgeway. In Swindon, 30 minutes away there is a new Designer Outlet Village!! House prices are dirt cheap at the minute [1997] but going up: buy now for best value.
  • Last week (July 10th 1997), the front page of the local paper published information from this site under a 'shock horror' expose. [Pity they didn't use any of the links to check what the site's about.] Funny thing, though: the info here is pretty close to the mark. Anyway, residents of Calne, don't worry, the local council are on the case. They've resolved to publish some leaflets about the town. [Sounds like someone asked them for a comment.] Way to go boys.
  • The local newspaper a few months ago had a shock-horror probe report into the contents of this guide. Last week the same newspaper reported that the council was a bit "miffed" and were in the process of spending 1700 pounds (!!) on a web site extolling the virtues of Calne. While this is on itself a commedable thing, the mind boggles at how/why a small web site will cost 1700 pounds plus maintenance!! For a small town council whose Council compatriots apparently don't have the money to put roof tiles on its leased housing, this seems phenomonal expenditure!!
  • There are somethings good about Calne, the only problem is that no one has found it yet. Ron's Live!!!

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Credits

All the information in the Knowhere Guide has been contributed by users over the years. No one person is responsible for it all and not all contributors will agree with all the opinions included.

Parts of this information have been supplied by: jbennett, FeistyDevil, gay boy, Can't say coz go 2 St. Marys, Peter Travis, mark, Vanessa Butt, S.lowe, jim, nutta, Ica, ken, Rachael Maddick, Allison davenport, Gonz, emily bullion, tony trotman, Clare, stoner, Gemma Cullan, Amanda, Didds, Jumbo Harris, katy wilson, woodnymph, Chris Nicholson, clare hartnell, Juan Peron, Robert Peeters, graham, sherrie lewis, Chris martin, bigfella, chris, Sid Charrise, CIDER DRINKER, anon, Alastair, Marsden, inbread calne freak, lee doyle, SHAZ, j, Marni, john, P. Lucas, Alan, generic, Chinese food lover, john edwards, somers, calne girl, Chris White, Phil Jamieson, Steve allen, Meister Kemp, rob south, Joanna, Ben Camp, Danni B, mike sayles, Ian Mac, Jeremy Bowen, mica cox, j.punshon, Lynda Boyd, freak, Johnny E, George and domi

Last updated: 2008-10-14

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