Record Shops in Chaffley, Essex*

The places where you buy your music

You can tell us more about Chaffley.

• Quentin Wilson, bald sarcastic presenter of BBC series Top Gear has recently opened up his own record shop "Quentin Wilsons Drive Time Music Shack" which sells mainly soft rock music for peniley deficient males who see their car as a status symbol rather akin to the number of sheep a man had in the days of old. Those suffering from a mid life crisis can claim a free earing and a years membership of the "Old Men Picking Up Young Women Club", run by Alala MCGreeep
• Skullheadbassman is a record shop specialising in drum'n'bass classics. particularly Paul Caden classics.
• "Columbo's Records" in Old Man Steptoe Street is the best of the best for getting old records by bands like McHooter and the Trees and even more off beat bands like Quantumn Leapers. Having said that, there is an old mac hanging in the entrance which will surely grab you and try to strnagle the very life force from your body. BEWARE:On Haloween, the shop becomes a doorway between this worlds and the after life and many many goats come rushing through.
• For those fans of Jazz music there are few places you can go to get Jazz related records, namely "Hungry Horse" records which is owned by Peter Peltzer. He claims to have a vast collection of Jazz mags in his bedroom, which he invites all Chafflonians to look at with him.
• The best record shop in Chaffley has to be Paperback Records, owned by the mysterious Tim, it's certainly esoteric to say the least! Current titles on offer include "Reggie Dixons Hammond Organ Interpretations of the music of Matt Bianco" and the "Tijuana Brass Group play Mud". Other offers include Biscuit's Biscuit Biscuit Friday. In which Tim organises as part of his community service order, to have his friend Biscuit, place biscuits on top of other biscuit's to create a "Biscuit Biscuit" which is then served to children as a light snack. On Fridays. Mmm.
• The best record shop in Chafley is without a doubt "Tracey". Many people have been to here before and are certain to travel there again, due to the fact that 20 year old owner Tracey workd in the nude.
• "Yan: The Record Store", owned by TV's Dominic Diamond and his brother Dustin, serves most musical needs and tastes as well as being North-East Essex's premier importer of Salsa (the music not the sauce). There are branches of WH Smith's, Woolies and Andy's Records but these are all rather small and only of use to those with no taste in music. I mean come on, surely at this point in time there's no one who still wants to buy the Jon Secada album? Try the one by "The Hair Pies", it's much better and it rawks.

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Last updated: 2008-10-14