The Knowhere Guide

The Stuff We Can't Fit In Somewhere Else in Glasgow, Strathclyde*

The things which can't be categorised

You can tell us more about Glasgow.

The Stuff We Can't Fit In Somewhere Else
  • Apparently, there's only one sperm donor in Glasgow.
  • nice universities and really good schools around here, highlights are Calendonian Uni, Bell College, Glasgow Uni, Strathclyde Uni and Paisley Uni.
  • Events! Get a free invitation to all the coolest events in glasgow, whether it be launching the newest bars or watching fashion shows, you can be there! Simply sign up for free to DADA, fill in "YOU" under team name, and this specialist marketing company will then invite you to all the events that best suit your interets.
  • friendly people
  • it smells
  • It is alright. Althoug it has some character, Glasgow is slowly becoming souless and pissed. I mean blind drunk, like waking up in your mate's grandma drunk.
  • ah want Fuhu u u nnnn keeey .
  • Museums,parks etc free!!!
  • The waters mostly safe, the police are corrupt, herbs and fauna are aplenty (You should see the botanics at the height of summer!)
  • Unfortunately too many lazy dole-pimps in the city without a clue what the words 'work-ethic' mean. They'd rather blame their woes on the influx of asylum seekers - monitoring the situation in case the family from Kosovo in flat 45 gets a better fridge-freezer than they have. Get a life, get a job, get some self-respect!
  • Crap hospitals including the dreaded victoria infirmary.
  • The two boys named Jordan and Ryan who bum each other in Maryhill Park
  • bowlingball.co.uk - funniest site about Glasgow I have seen in a long time.
  • The little tobaco shop at george square sells a fine Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas ciggarillo holder .
  • for ur information irn bru was first made in Falkirk
  • Scotland is a wonderful country but it would be perfect if only Glasgow didn't exist.
  • The bus station at the St Enochs square is no longer present.
  • glasgow nights out ,,,i.e DANCE HALLS AND NIGHTCLUBS OF OLD>>>> in glasgow...
  • wooof
  • As of 2002, it is impossible to walk down any major street in the city centre without being stopped by around 10 people who basically all want your money. I'll summarise some of the worst now: 1. Big Issue (BI) vendors. The BI is a magazine sold by homeless people who get to keep most of the money from the sale for themselves in order to give them some sort of income. At least, that's the idea. While a lot of the vendors are just out to earn an honest buck, there are even more who are on the scam. Designer-clothed, mobile-phone toting are the funniest. When I was a student they would have at least twice the money I did. Many of them will also ask you for spare change, which they're not supposed to do. 2: Winos/Beggars. You're bog-standard, pee-smelling, buckfast-toting men we've all come to know and hate. You're guaranteed to meet at least 5 of these characters on your way from Queen Street station to argyle street. Fun ways to avoid them include hiding under other people's jacket, firmly listening to your personal stereo, or indeed kicking rubbish at them. 3: Charity workers. BEWARE! I'm not talking about wee old grannies shaking a collecting can and giving out flags, no - today's charity workers are a whole different species altogether. Clad in bright coloured vests, around 20-30 of these bank detail-seeking whores will stalk innocent passers-by in the street and try to engage you in conversation, at the end of which they'll ask to see your bank card. Gone are the days of dropping a 50p in to alleviate your guilt. No, these people are getting paid around 7 an hour, and have targets, team meetings and incentive schemes. Probably never seen a tree, let alone hugged one. Probably time for a cull... 4. Religious nuts (Krsna's) - sorry for the spelling. Well, what can you say..(gouranga). Generally harmless but ultimately after your money or groceries (?), usually clad in odd robes trying to sell you naff cds or frisbees and entice you into the ways of veganism, vedic practice and shouting gouranga - it normally takes 2 or 3 firm words to get rid of them. Others to watch out for are neds (anyone in sportswear with gold jewellery, a nasal accent, no education and a baseball cap at an incomprehensible angle); Special Offer card dispensers; Market Researchers and more. Welcome to glasgow...gonna gies 50p fer tha bus ?
  • chris is apparently the best as is jeni apparently *cough* Neil rulkes cause he is sexy.
  • NEDS NEDS NEDS SENGAS SENGAS SENGAS NEDS SENGAS NEDS SENGAS AND DID I MENTION NEDS AND SENGAS?! If they weren't so distructive Glasgow would be much nicer, in my opinion.
  • missing person gillian mcgregor 14 years old 5'3" medium build pale blue eyes, pale complexion. blond shoulder length hair (dyed) was wearing blue jeans, white trainers and a black kickers jumper. went missind from edinburgh zoo onwed 6th march. if seen contact dundee police on 01382 223200.
  • neds...neds ...neds .........goths..goths...goths.......fat people...ignorant old folk........ugly people....ming-az.....geeks....boring places......run down housing schemes....junkies.....weirdo's........greetin weans.......boggin faces.....U WANT IT GLEZGA HAS GOT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Glasgow is a lively, vibrant city. The people can be very colourful and humerous but they also tend to be rather narrow minded in the sense that they have this rigid 'you have to be a billy or a tim' to gain acceptance. A lot of them will not accept you unless you are one or the other. There also tends to be a blinkered terrotorial gang culture where the pack mentality rules and if yer fae the wrang scheme ye cid end up wae a Glesga grin. Glaswegians are not the brightest tools in the box but they know how to have a good drink, a good laugh and a good fight. If your'e a party animal, Glasgow would suit ye down to the ground but if you are a bit of a bright spark, it could get u into a bit of soapy bubble as they may think you are an English snob fae the uni and they hate brainy folk man so they dae by the way!!!
  • Think ive said it all.
  • Hi, Please take a look at this site. I feel that it may be of interest to anyone with Scottish, especially, Glasgow, roots or associations. Our URL is http://ootthewindae.net Our title is Oot The Windae Our description is Memories Of A Glasgow Childhood Hope you like ma wee book! David Reilly
  • www.walkabout-tours.com are audio-guided historical walking tours of the old part of the city. You can hire them (incl overnight) from the main Tourist Office in George Square. Actors, scenarios, and sound effects take you on a trip back through time....it's really good!!
  • ONE OF THE MOST WELL KNOWN FEATURES OF GLASGOW AND ALSO ONE OF THE MOST DISLIKED FEATURES IS THE FAMOUS GLESGA NEDS FOR ALL YOU TOURISTS OUT THERE I WILL EXPLAIN TAE YOU EXACTLY WHAT A NED IS.BEING AN EX NED MYSELF I AM ABLE TO FULLY DESCRIBE THE ANTICS ME AND MY STUPID CHILDHOOD FRIENDS GOT UP TO.FIRST OF ALL NEDS (Non Educated Delinquents) ARE USUALLY BOYS (OR SOMETIMES GIRLS)WHO COME FROM POORER AREAS OF GLASGOW e.g. POSSIL,MILTON,EASTERHOUSE... THEY RANGE IN AGE FROM ABOUT 10-19.THEY USUALLY HANG ABOUT THIER AREAS IN GANGS WHICH WILL FIGHT AGAINST OTHER NED GANGS FROM NEARBY SCHEMES THEY USUALLY NAME THE GANGS AFTER THIER HOUSING SCHEME e.g.YOUNG POSSIL FLEETO,YOUNG MARYHILL FLEETO AND SO ON SO ON...AND IT IS COMMONPLACE IN GLASGOW TAE SEE GANG NAMES SCRAWLED ONTO WALLS.ANOTHER TYPE OF GRAFFITTI IS THE MENCHIE THIS COMES FROM THE WORD MENTION THIS IS WHEN NEDS WILL WRITE THIER NAME AND MAYBE GANG SLOGANS ON WALLS. ATTIRE:NOW THE NEDS OF GLASGOW USUALLY WEAR SPORTS CLOTHES ESPECIALLY TRACKSUITS THEY CAN ALSO BE SEEN WEARING BASEBALL CAPS POINTED UP AT A WIERD ANGLE ALSO AN OLD FAVOURITE OF MINE WAS STEALING CAPS FROM OTHER NEDS TO EITHER SELL IT OR WEAR IT THIS HAPPENS QUITE ALOT AMONGST GLESGA NEDS.SOMETIME NEDS CAN ALSO BE SEEN WEARING JEWELLRY LIKE CHAINS OR BRACELETS BUT THE WELL KNOWN TRADEMARK OF A NED HAS GOT TAE BE SOVERIEGN RINGS OR "SOVVIES" AS THEY ARE SOMETIMES KNOWN.ALTHOUGH THIS DISNAE NECESSARILY MEAN THAT ANYBODY WHO WEARS SPORTS CLOTHES AND JEWELLRY IS A NED. MOST NEDS WILL HANG ABOUT AND FIGHT OR AT THE WEEKEND GO TAE LOCAL U18 CLUBS ALSO KNOWN AS "THE DANCIN" THE NEDS WILL PROBABLY FILL UP ON CHEAP BOOZE LIKE BUCKFAST(BUCKIE),PULSE CIDER,OR MD 2020 (MAD DOG). AFTER A FEW FIGHT IN THE DANCIN THE NEDS WILL USUALLY FIGHT OUTSIDE AND IT IS QUITE COMMON TAE SEE SOMEONE LEFT SERIOUSLY INJURED AFTER A BRAWL.
  • THIS GUIDE IS A TINY BIT UNDERWHELMING AND CLEARLY ALL THE PEOPLE WHO WRITE IN ARE AS BORED AS I AM
  • the underground, which is just a mini-one compared with London, Paris, New York etc, but hey.... it gets you where you want to go! As long as its the West end or Govan.
  • Everyone should instead of writing their name on the wall they should write there mobi no. on it
  • did you know Glasgo is the European captital of Software piracy? Visit the Barras every sat and Sunday for 10000s of poonds worth of free software - very up to date. Also 'Chipped' BT phones which give you unlimited calls for free and'Chipped' playstations.
  • JUST SOME OF THE PATTER WHICH MIGHT HELP ANY FUTURE GUESTS TO THE CITY :) HOW'S IT GAW'IN? - HOW ARE THING'S WITH YOU? BOLT - COULD BE EITHER - RUN, MOVE AWAY QUICKLY OR THE 'WEIGIE' IS TELLING YOU POLITLY TO FORGET IT! POLIS - POLICE. AGAIN VISITORS DON'T BE SURPRISED IF YOUR CALLED JIMMY, PAL, BIG MAN - ALL FRIENDLY, POSITIVE NAMES FOR STRANGERS!
  • IRN-BRU WAS ORIGINALLY CALLED 'IRON-BREW', THE NAME WAS CHANGED AS GLASWEIGANS PRONOUNCED IT AS 'IRN-BRU'. FIRST BREWED AND SOLD IN GLASGOW, SCOTLAND IS STILL THE ONLY COUNTRY IN THE WORLD WHERE COCA-COLA IS NOT THE NUMBER ONE DRINK OF THE COUNTRY! GLASGOW IS THE ONLY CITY IN EUROPE TO HAVE THREE STADIUMS WITH A CAPACITY OF 50,000+
  • Strathclyde has been discontinued - we are now back, I think, to Glasgow, Lanarkshire.
  • I like to eat my dindins, I really do, man.
  • EVERYTHING IN YOUR GUIDE IS NONSENSE AND ABOUT 4 YEARS OUT OF DATE> A GREAT LIST OF PUBS, CLUBS, VENUES, ETC FROM circa 1994 OF NO USE TO ANYONE WISHING INFO ON GLASGOW NOW ( or even then!!!!) VERY LAZY+ POOR STUFF
  • Off Licence: Haddows on Great West Road
  • Football Team: Celtic.
  • Glasgow has at least one other official football team: Glasgow Rangers.
  • It's worth noting that rivalry between the Celtic Green and the Ranger Blue is heated, at best...
  • The Link Cafe at 239 North Street next door to the Ritz bar. The best thing about us is you can surf the net for just £2.50 (student's rate £2.00) and buy an e.mail address for £1 a week. The worst thing is we're open 7 days a week 8-11 Mon-Fri 10-11 Sat. 12-11 Sun.
  • The one essential thing to do on Byres Road is the charity shop crawl... start at Oxfam round the corner on Great Western Road, work your way down through Imperial Cancer, another Oxfam, Barnado's, Save the Children and end on Dumbarton Road at the PDSA.
  • Plans to make Glasgow biggest shopping centre outside London. There is a kind of an on-going rivalry between West end and City Centre (especially Merchant City) - which means better bars are popping up all over the place.

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All the information in the Knowhere Guide has been contributed by users over the years. No one person is responsible for it all and not all contributors will agree with all the opinions included.

Parts of this information have been supplied by: Kevin Burleigh, Tom Murray, emma watson, Gary B, mick, jonny snee, brian robinson, neil, Andy Roberts, modeski, janet, Tony Love, Mike Kulwicki, Ashley, Russell Cassidy, Karl', Joker, andy brown, chrisy, Claire, Malky, Iain Sandlan, Ciaran M., Dave, jay hoolihan, Samantha, frank, audrey horton, Natalie, ricky, Drew, lj, johnny, Robert Shah, Magnum, pauline connolly, m0r1arty, Noeleen-Anne Murphy, LM, sam coleman, sarah, Kevin Wilson, David Cameron, Ross Aitchison, tom simpson, Yon Yin, stacey, ivor biggun, Pooka, jules, SARAH LAKER, andrea, Decci, Morag Malloy, jonathan emery, Angie P, Windmill, jake, Becky Thomson, leighlou, tommy hopper, Mike, matt, Steve Kelly, Michael Devaney, bigjtlh, fi, Andy C, ybf ya bass, Hecotr, DRUNKEN JOCK, gemma, Jamie, laure, hoggie, alannisbet, peter the painter, JENNY, *, STUART ELLIOTT, settlov, amserious, Jimmy, David Tait, darren, tino, Disco Davy, Robert Gillespie, jcn, jiop, Max Murphy, Michael Cameron, paul jarvie, Dauvit Alexander, SRD, Lorna, Kerr, Andy, Teresa Attwater, jim thomas, Phil Howie, Mike Malcolm, Tracy, Susan J Matthews, Peter Halliday, David Evans, Katie Sutherland, Niall, FRASER MCNEILL, Lennox Ogilvie, iain, jav, Mizium, Gunner, louise, Skate Cambie, Craig Morris, wee man, Kenny Hamilton, lukez, James, electrochix, Alice, Kelly McGachy, Jess, joe Blow, ruth mackenzie, ed smith, Brian, Neil Burrows, rebecca ridding, James Grady, Fergie, cat, marky wilson, Hazel, Unhappy, Jen Lavery, Phil, jason, jackie, teggs, Nokbongwa, sappa, Trip, David, peter, GCHALMERS, Anne Horner, Stephen, Stuart Forsyth, James Murray, Fitlike, Ash Duffy, Andy Steele, Kev Stronach, caitlyn maccabe, Jane, David Roddie, Swirly, Brian Mcculloch, Derek Sweeney, margaret bean, M., m.c.muir, tim mc tim, stu, Vic Reeves, JOE MCDOUGLE, j, ian, claire mccluskey, john smith, Wodieskodie, Paul Climie, Kamilah Neighbors, kelsey, Neil gilkison, Nobreath, susan, Alan, Zhan McIntyre, Derek Dunnington, Suzanne C, generic, Katie, Danny, nemisis, jerry adams, Vikki Laing, Audrey, paul mcdonagh, Michael, mark bryans, Ronnie, Paula McGuinness, COLIN FRASER, kyle.campbell, wilkie, yungster, Shirley, Holly, Kelly Durham, Muninn, Ray, catherine s, Alex Boyd, bevy, Rob, wolfie1979, gordyboy, Gary Boi, Louise Carruthers, Deputy Davieboy, jennifer, John, Gillian, TD, David Reilly, Douglas Nicol

Last updated: 2010-08-17

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