The Worst Things in Leamington Spa, Warwickshire*

The entirely missable and worth mentioning because of it

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• serious small town/parochial mentality from the locals - you know whos local; the ones who stare if youre in any way different to them.
• being stared at/given funny looks constantly as if you are an alien with three heads if you are homosexual or look as if you might be (or if you are in any way different to the locals) - middle england hell!
• The lack of scenic off-road or car-free cycle routes and good countryside walking. The expensive buses. The lack of a local snowdome. The town planners who make a fuss over some attractive canopies on a cafe frontage but allow an enormous new eye-sore seikh temple which looks completely alien and out of character with Leamington generally. The poxy little Marks & Spencer, though it's better than Rugby's. The lack of decent shoe shops for kids. Newbold leisure cntre - compare it to say the sports centre in Douglas. The pool is unimaginative and not that clean.
• Being pointed at and laughed at by pretentious middle class-inbred hybrids because you look a bit different to them.
• The size of Leamington is small and there is a lack of alternative shops.. particularly if you are on a budget.
• the people who have slowly crawld in over the years!
• everyone knows your buisness before you do...gossipin busy bodys....
• the freeman and greatheed shorties
• Coming back at the start of the next term.
• The doormen at Sugar, the abusive chavs at nightime - try to avoid the pump room gardens and vicky park, you may be beaten up for no reason and MacDonalds!
• ppl and theres not to much to do in the day time
• I can't believe there are people coming on here and slagging off Leamington! You don't know how lucky you are! My parents moved me away when i was 6 - i have to live in bloody Nuneaton now! Leamington and South Warwickshire in general is different class.
• too busy
• Need more 'trendy bars' they are slightly fizzling out. Estate agents - all very grumpy!!
• Snotty fried eggs. Too low tables. Stupid druggies who wonder about town speaking to themselves. Get a life or get a death!
• the worst thing would have to be the amount of shav's there are lurking everywhere cuz trust me they really are every bloody where!! if you visit us and see a group of young people screaming, wearing mostly white and baseball caps then walk slowly away in the opposite direction without making eye contact!!! It will not be difficult to recognise a towny (shav) from a normal person, because pretty much all of them label themselves with at least one of the following in big letters: ADIDAS NIKE HENRI LLOYD KAPPA KICKERS REEBOK and FCUK they like to think this is what is known as fashion i on the other hand like to think of this as a warning to all parents, steer clear of all of the above!! when your nine year old son asks for a pair of Rockport shoes and a thick silver or gold chain i suggest you move to the country side!!! BEWARE of the men and women in WHITE!!!
• Dog poo underfoot. Even worse when it follows you all the way home and onto your carpets.
• Litter - DON'T DROP IT. Not enough money is spent on the canal section of town, which could be a brilliant asset to the area.
• warwick! boring boring boring!!!!! nothing happens, nowhere to go, and full of warwick people! people knocking lillington, i lived in warwick for 15 years moved to lillington and very happy, fed up of people judging lillington because of reputation of the flats....what about percy estate,the forbes.......
• so many places where u cant sk8 how unfair?!?!
• Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's, Rio's,
• Fat birds in leggings. Stupid kids with spikey hair, collars and new jeans (ironed). People who walk too slowly.
• Skaters, students and F****** Goths!! To many long faced pastey W****** clumping around and gettin in the way.
• The worst thing? Guys who think it's cool to walk around stripped to the waist at the first sign of sunshine. Do you really think that women find that attractive? I don't know of one who does! We all think you look like smelly oafs. The last thing I want to see on a summer's day is some lager swilling meathead walking towards me with his half deflated six pack and beefy teats exposed to the world. The only people who find it attractive are homosexuals. Think about it. Aha! Maybe that's why you guys do it??! Suddenly all becomes clear...
• Bloody skateboarders
• The worst things? Stupid white males who think they look cool and/or sexy by stripping to the waist as soon as the sun dares to show itself. There is not a single intelligent woman on this planet who think you look alluring, guys! You just look sweaty, repulsive and homosexual. Think about that next time you decide to treat the hoi polloi to an unasked for glimpse of your "rippling torsos"...
• The bandstand in the Pump Room Gardens. In itself it's fine but stupid dumb ass skateboarder kids have wrecked it completely with their inane butt-munching antics. Don't try and justify it by calling it a sport or art! They're just hooligans who don't give a shit for anybody else's property. That bandstand has stood in Leam for over a hundred years - now it's fucked and may as well be pulled down. Next time you skateboarders think it's funny to plough through the railings on your skateboard TOY and msash bottles all over the place just bear in mind all the little kids who also like to play in that park area and risk serious injury because of your scummy attitudes.
• the fact that already mentioned boyfriend will probably leave you for your friends dogs auntys sister. oh and that no one ever leaves. I think that thing about the curse is so true!
• Crap gay scene (could do with a permanent gay hangabout) - and not many bookstores.
• I have noticed with increasing horror the rise in the numbers of kappa wearing, gel toting 14 year olds in Leamington. I can only apologise, if you encounter any , chances are they will abuse you and possibly rob you, for this I am deeply sorry. Also beware of some of the goths, a few of them seriously believe they are vampires and, although they are essentially completely harmless, there is a strong chance they will bore you to death.
• The fact that nearly everyone who has submitted something to this guide has made appalling spelling mistakes. I blame Trinity School.
• goths, stuck up people, tarty slapper girls
• All the tramps and beggars on the street who sit outside banks and ask you for money just as you're going inside.(blatantly to get money out!) And then they ask again as you come out and it makes you feel so guilty! But then again, maybe not, i don't feel guilty anyway - i've hardly got enough money to live on myself!
• the shops arent huge and after you've been a few times you might get a bit bored. The clubs are rough and are not friendly, so its not a good place to spend all night. There are no alternative clubs anywhere.
• the mass of immature blokes with the townie attitude who feel they have the right to spontaeneously beat up people they pass in the street for 'looking at them' or because they dress in a way different to themselves. its pathetic and has to stop.
• the lack of out door eating and drinking all over leamington, the lack of music venues.....cant we send the whole of the local councillors over to the lanes in Brighton!!??....do they not know what it would do for tourism and getting people to visit from a wide local area.
• The bowls players in the summer. Nowhere pretty and safe to take the kids out for a leisure ride on their bikes - have to drive to Stratford Greenway, Nottingham, Northampton or further. What a shame Sustrans couldn't turn the old railway track that runs through Offchurch into a cycle track.
• No sea nearby.
• moved here last September from warwick and the fighting at weekends after pubs let out is awful, also gangs of kids hanging out in park trying to hide the dealing going on. My little boy picking up used syringes from the parks!!
• Rio's - The biggest shithole in the whole of Leamington. The bouncers are tossers who think it is great to keep everyone waiting for hours when the place is half empty. Chris the owner who is as dodgy as....... and objects to any decent club that wants to open up in Leamington. He obviously has a few friends on the council and well oils their palms so decent clubs cant open. Generally the place itself..... you pay a fiver to get in, drink watered down overpriced drinks, your feet stick to the carpet, they don't know what air conditioning is so after half an hour everyone stinks and the mirrors have condensation on them. One half of it is ALWAYS shut so they cram everyone on one floor. Oh, finally, there is one decent bouncer in there..... Alvin, took a bullet once!
• being chatted up in the park by a 15 year old boy by the name of ashley lowe!. this has put me off leamington spa
• A dive shop (which shall remain nameless) with a shop manager who freely admits she can barely dive in a swimming pool but has all the answers and is never wrong
• Benjamin Satchwells. Why is one of the only decent pubs in Leamington filled with 40 year olds?????
• The complete lack of any decent live music.
• Pretentious 'bars' like Baroque
• The precious people who love themselves, and think paying £2.50 a pint makes them exclusive.
• Rip-off taxi drivers. Not enough respectable clubs. Ridiculously dressed-up small children with no fashion sense/spew-control
• Lillington is bloody HORRIBLE! So are most of the pubs at the top of town, and if you want to avoid an all out fight fest, totally avoid the top of the Parade on a Friday and Saturday night! (10.30 onwards!)
• Tachbrrok Road. I can't believe how many weirdos and toothless simpletons walk down that street and no I'm not one of them!
• Contrary to what other people seem to have said you can't find an attractive woman in Leamington. At least not when you're sober.
• expensive clubs SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR
• the youngh kids who hang out at robin's well
• THE WHOLE OF LEAMINGTON!!
• CLARA - bunch of anal retentives who think that all new buildings should be cod-Regency/Georgian. WAKE UP!! The local press - I'd say that they're in the pockets of the local arch Tories, but it would be a waste of time because they'd never notice - they've been deafened by the shrill blast of the hunting horn.
• For the size of the place and the amount of going out type people there's pretty poor support for interesting music / DJ / club and very little that is cutting edge or stimulating for those weary of syndicated entertainment. Not enough house parties. Thanks to high rent and fear of people losing their deposits. Leamington seems to have quite bad air. Perhaps it's low elevation acts as a trap for much of the Midlands
• stuck up their own arses
• Rude boys.
• People who have spend the last 5 (or more) years of their lives sitting in pubs drinking, smoking and complaining how boring Laemington is
• Rudens, from Trampion or Shyton. AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHh???? Why are they always up for a rucas? Have they nothing better to do?
• It is the biggest town by popualtion not to have a Football Team representing the town, and its all cos of Val Davis and her shitty Liberal Council of the late 80's and where are they now? (the council not the Football team). Out on their arses that's where Come on you Brakes! The other worst thing is finding out that I would have earnt more by not selling my house in Leamington than I have by working for the last 10 years. Yep, could have earnt more by doing fuck all and just letting my house accumulate value. M40 you arse.
• Tourists!
• Snobs
• In such a comparitively small and affluent town, its depressing to see that the Big Issue have had to set up an operation here.
• The 'Stars' that frequent the Spa Centre. Come on, who wants Joe Pasquale and Des O'Connor invading the quality streets of Leam.
• Students who insist on sitting round a table in the pub shouting conversations at each other and all the b@stard teenagers who hang around the Royal Priors on Saturday afternoons.
• THE WEIRDOS!!!! Where the hell do they come from? I thought Bristol was bad for weird freaks but Leamington is leagues ahead!
• Tesco's Trinty School
• the people on friday night
• On the other hand people recognise you all the time, not that it is abad thing but it can get annoying having to shake hands with a million people everytime you want to go to town for a magazine
• Flooding! Don't live just South of the River, 'cos your basement has a tendency to convert itself into a swimming pool.
• The local paper (very right wing). No gay scene (everyone goes to Warwick, or Coventry, or Brum).
• The f**kwits from Coventry who come for "a wicked noite aaat man".
• Bad things - all the students from Warwick Uni!
• No night Clubs worth going to. Some really shit pubs opening up which attract the people who think they're cool if they go to a pub and pay loads for a pint and get to sit on a shite aluminium chair. The place really needs a proper cocktail bar.
• All the aggro bastard lads that go out on Friday and Saturday night, same as any town any where.

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Last updated: 2010-09-03