The Worst Things in Liphook, Hampshire*

The entirely missable and worth mentioning because of it

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• The pond in Raddy that has the crocodile in it (and a motorbike)
• The Pikeys, Townies, Gyppos, call em what you will, gleefully escaping the Bordon area where their bread and butter (scavenging from the army) is slowly drying up. The boy racers, who need bricks through their Nova 1.1s blacked out windows and basketballs up their ridiculous exhaust pipes What else...hmm let me think - yeah, the kebab wagon - watch in awe as grease-boy picks his nose before carving off lumps of barely warmed flesh, packaging it in something stale and yeast based and lovingly topping it off with subtly browning vegetable matter more than likely picked from the bank in the layby. Did I mention the railway? you wait for nearly an hour in the freezing cold, only to have the train blow-through at 100 mph taking out your ear-drums in the process.
• The cringing cult of celebrity.
• The Liphook Kraken Breeding Program
• Those wankers that scream at you as you walk down Midhurst Rd.
• Townies, it's complete lack of anything to do. Oh yeah,, watch out for the pathetic 1.2 fiestas with equally pathetic drivers which will try and run you over.
• Sad Basterds that hang around in Laybys

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Last updated: 2008-10-14