The Knowhere Guide

The Stuff We Can't Fit In Somewhere Else in Middlewich, Cheshire*

The things which can't be categorised

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The Stuff We Can't Fit In Somewhere Else
  • There is a yearly Folk & Boat festival which is normally quite good, but as ever getting more expensive (if you have kids) around the main events, Always lots of drinking and merry making though. Good few days and nighht out. Old history as point of Roman settlement, due to the Salt in the area (which is now also gathered by foreign interests) and location between main outposts geographically. Close to M6 (jct 18)
  • MIDDLEWICH FEMALE MAFIA
  • Frank Piratzzo is a kiddie fiddler, so dont leave you kids with him.
  • middlewich is shit! middle of nowhere!
  • there are some flads loose on wheelock st. damn council!
  • i have a boil on my ass
  • CRAIG MCGHEE LOVES DILDOS
  • me :D
  • When you visit, don't do it alone...unless you like being set upon by a maraunding bunch of gyppos. No one with any power can be bothered to sort that little problem out......something to do with the board for racial equality...yeah...but they don't live near you do they???? Don't think the police will do anything either...they're terrified of em'!!
  • if your thinking of buying a house,avoid the ones along booth lane with the in your face iron railings they are owned by gypos.
  • Swimming pool plz (balls to that no one wants 1)
  • Well, to begin with, the once-proud town of Middlewich has been now over-run in what I call the 'Invasion of the Jippo Armies', the invasion began approx. 2-3 years ago, maybe even farther back then that even, but I am afraid that I don't remember too well. Anyway, the Middlewich Council were warned of a new threat sweeping across the Cheshire region like the Plague, they were known as the Jippos, a savage, barbaric race of creatures bent on stealing every bike and motorcycle around. The 'Jippo Invasion' began when the small town of Morton on the outskirts of Middlewich was taken, this meant that they had an opening to Middlewich, an opening which cost this town its life. Despite war raging around the borders of Middlewich between the good residents and the Jippos, we have been unable to push the Jippo forces back and I fear that it is too late for the town, it will soon fall and become a place of caravan sites, rubbish tips and fields full of children wearing wellies stroking young farm animals that the Jippos seem to breed well in towns. But alas, to the anthem of 'Land of Hope and Glory' we will fight the Jippos to the last man, we will try out best and fight in vain to banish them, the fight continues...Join the fight today! Your town needs you! Visit the Town Council Offices today for information on how to volunteer in the Middlewichian Army.
  • The place where ex-Chelsea MD Matthew Harding died when his Helicopter crashed.
  • jipos buy houses in middlewich and sell their garden space to other jipos so the can camp there we dont wont that ion our town

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Credits

All the information in the Knowhere Guide has been contributed by users over the years. No one person is responsible for it all and not all contributors will agree with all the opinions included.

Parts of this information have been supplied by: Anonymous, james morgan, retribution, Stu Marshall, mark, Peter Stillman, Will, MoE, davey boy smith, Ivor Widen, Korally_boy, Mary jane, James Davison, Joe ninety, alvin fartuncle, danny, Lorri, Alan, generic, pissedoff, Daz the Fish, Debbie, korally, Jobsworth, dave jackson, mr m, david moore, Cheshire Local, Geoff Mather, Adam Moore, Chalky White, Anon, jobs worth, steve, Warren Hall, Adam Bell, s oliver, adam, Umm Danone, Bez, Chloe, Betty Scotabiggen, Steven Brooks, yan, Rob, milton, james stanier, james ritchie, jenny taylier, sarah, cooke, Harry, Peter Hardgreves, jayne nash, Ramirez

Last updated: 2014-07-03

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