The Stuff We Can't Fit In Somewhere Else in Stockton-on-Tees, Cleveland*

The things which can't be categorised

You can tell us more about Stockton-on-Tees.

The Stuff We Can't Fit In Somewhere Else

• the fun times of stockton on tees:the groups of drunken females who are forced to stand outside to have a cigarette who when a male of slight actractiveness happens to stumble upon them they then proceed to throw themseleves on him in desperate hope that he will say yes to there "subtle" advances and take her home,the hords of drunk males who also stand outside the pub having a nicotine fix who then proceed to have an all out brawl after one of them said his girlfriend was a bit unatratcive(or in stockton terms your girlfriend is a f**king munter mate)or expressed a bit too much interest in a mans female friend (f**k me id do her rotten),"accidently" stubbed a cigarette out in someones eye,said a few harsh words towards middlesbrough football club(Most stockton fellas love middlesbrough so do not throw insults about or you could end up in north tees hospital or james cook depending on the severity of the injuries*),the "subtley" of most stockton woman who on friday night after a session on the wkd or bacardi breezer or other p*ss poor alcopops throw themseleves at almost any gentleman in hope of getting some late night fun,laughing at tramps who beg for money for their latest fix of 4 cans of tennants superstrong and if hes hardcore a wrap of heroin
• dont eat yellow snow !! dont eat kebabs either!!
• Piss off.
• For the idiot who said Hardwick and Bishopsgarth have a smack problem they are obviously taking the stuff themselves, hardwick has but bishopsgarth hasnt and never has had, how many smack heads do you know who own there own house? which is the only way you will get a house on bishopsgarth, i should know as i have lived nearby all my life in elm tree and went to bishopagarth school. Two years ago i decided to buy a house in bishopsgarth which i would not have done if it was a smack city, i cant stand the scruffy pratts.
• I'm 13 and i hate stockton like mad. I am SO gunna move out. Stokcton is a grotty disgusting s***hole which millions of ugly annoying townies and way 2 many slappers. I HATE TOWNIES!!! Go home - read a book you thickos. They annoy every1 when people sud be making fun of them cos the girls (slappers) will end up preg at 14 and the lads will kill them selfs by drinking and smoking themselves into an early death bed. DAMM TOWNIES!!
• Stockton is going down the pan, the smackheads all need killing will a lethal dose of heroin and the streets might be a bit better. gone are the days when u can go out and not think you're gonna get mugged or hit for any reason, well bring it on smackheads cos i tell ya i'd snap you're skinny little chicken legs rather than let u take my bag!!!!!!
• we luv stockton cos its mint n if u dont like it move away or just dont visit

• Parmo's are only available in teesside. anywhere else, they're unheard of.....
• BEWARE PET OWNERS!!! Cat thefts!! Caught 3 sick scum bags (hoods & caps, trackys tucked into socks) on bikes at about 4am on BRADBURRY ROAD stealing pet cats from the street. These sickos steal cats to train dogs for dog fights. These are the sickest scrotes around and there only kids! Spoken to RSPCA staff & they say its not uncommon. Next scrote I find will be nailed to a tree!
• Daring, sexy and wildly entertaining there is a brand new buzz in town. This is an opportunity not to be missed! Anouncing the Stockton premier of NoFit State Circus’ brand new production "ImMortal". Directed by Firenza Guidi, NoFit State is touring the ImMortal show across the UK in their new atmospheric spaceship big top. This is an outstanding experience (with It’s own bar!!). Certified to revitalise your passion for life. The show is a funky fusion of live band music, DJ’s, dance and film with wild and outrageous circus theatre. - book your tickets early!! Currently wowing audiences in across the UK - London Time Out - Critic's Choice - 11th June 2004 The ImMortal show tours across some of the UK’s most prestigious venues, including London, Birmingham and Manchester. The show opens in Stockton on Tees on Friday 23rd July Stockton International Riverside Festival Trinity Church Grounds, Friday 23rd July - Sunday 1st August Evening shows 7.30 pm(excluding Monday 26th and Sunday1st ), matinees at 3pm Sat/Sun only. www.nofitstate.com "amusing, thought provoking and totally mesmerising " The Stage BOX OFFICE 0870 126 1771
• if ever enyting was nice stockton council killed it in the name of self intrest
• bowesfield were the refguees r they proppa horrible, keep away from shafsbury street becuae they r all in there, bout 20 live in 1 house. if u talk 2 them they hastle u for the rest of ya live. so plzzz go bk to ur own cuntry, dont have ours coz it is full of black people now .
• Parmos. Nowhere on the planet apart from Teesside can you get a parmesan and if you could - it would be shit.
• mint george and his frends i dont no they kik ass sam and paxton from the skate park as well as jonny

• Every year SIRF is held (stockton international riverside festival) it's full off class music and amazing street theatre. loads of acts use it as a final stop beore peforming at the huuuge edinburgh festival so we get the best of the best. the carnival is a highlight of it all and it's possible to be involved in a lot of the large-scale theatre n shit.!!!! tis mint! enjoy...
• TANFASTIC tanning salon on norton road where the fit girlies work!
• Stockton is full of townies, they will start on you for no reason.. just avoid lookin them in the eyes and if they ask 4 money (usually 20-60p) just say sorry got no money then dissapere quickly!
• ompetition. This event will highlight the massive skate scene in the North East and showcase the Ape Skatepark as one of the best kept secrets in UK skateboarding (A 27,000 square ft. World War II Aircraft Hangar!). All indoor with mini ramp, 2 midi ramps, bowled corners, street course, sponge pit, many quarters etc. shop and café. Top UK Skaters Craig Smedley, Ian Rees and Adam Fletcher are confirmed so far. Product from sponsors will be awarded to the Amateur comp winners. If you would like to attend, enter, sponsor, advertise or donate product for the Amateur Comps, please ring: Niall: 07952 754260 or Roger: 01642 764114 or e-mail: rmpawah@aol.com - niall@giganticskateboards.co.uk
• There's a cool man in stockton who makes photo holders out of straight bits of metal!Very clever!
• im sorry but mentioned on this site is that roseworth is a bad estate the only thing bad about it is thats its surrounded by hardwick and ragworth!!! most of roseworth have people who havebought there houses!!! not all council wallers
• IT HAS TO BE ONE OF THE WORST TOWNS,FULL OF SMACKED UP DRUGGIES WALKING ROUND IN A DAZE!(USUALLY ON A SATURDAY-MUST BE GIRO DAY!) NOT A PLACE ANYONE WOULD LIKE TO VISIT! THE PUBS ARE CRAP UNLESS YOUR UP FOR A GOOD FIGHT! OR YOU WANT A DOSE OF THE SHITS FROM THE MANKY BEER! FULL OF COMMONERS!!!
• we are mad... an we do talk to ourselves...
• if you get the chance to come here DONT DO IT go somewhere else like Milton Keynes or Bognor - trust me
• we stocktoniens must have done something right for all you whingeing gits to come up here for your education, I have seen how you conduct yourselves and it would not go down well with your mummies and daddies in suberbia
• ok i live in stockton now and in a year i will be out of the dump! There is nothing to do and the town is full of druggies!Theres no decent shops hardly and the only good thing is the riverside festival which happens once a year.We need more places which are good and interesting.
• Hardwick may be full of smackheads but Bishopsgarth aint, get it right.
• stockton looks nice when its sunny.
• In case any southerns read this it's an awful place. Please dont come here, (any use of irony fully intendent)
• The residents of Hardwick, Roseworth, Blue Hall, Ragworth and Tilery provide much amusement with their turns of speech: "Aw man, I swear down there's no need for that" being the best.
• If you're a mindless psychopathic druggy then Soddom-on-Tees is THE place to hang out with your peers.
• Interestingly enough - the aforementioned statue of Johnny Walker, the inventor of the friction match is FALSE. The sculptor who was commissioned to create the likeness obtained a picture of another Johnny Walker who, although a local dignatory, was the wrong Johnny Walker! This lie has been given added creedence by the reproduction of the wrong Johnny Walker picture in several 'history' books. The statue may have been pulled down with the recent renovation of the Castlegate Centre.
• Also - Stockton once had a Castle which was located next to the Stockton side of the Victoria Bridge. This was hotly contested for many years, being occupied on several occassions by the Scots on their raiding trips into Durham. It was later demolished by Cromwell in order to stop such occupations from happening. Unfortunatly, those wise and great politicians of Stockton (mentioned previously) wisely decided to replace it with the various buildings which make up the Castlegate Centre and other such retail outlets. Similarly, politicans have seen the destruction and downgrading of much of Stockton's rich history - the list is long. Still, they did create a tin replica of Cook's Ship (despite evidence which points to Cook never having visited Stockton).
• I would just like to point out that Stockton does not have no-talent politicans! I know quite a lot of the politicans of Stockton-on-Tees, I belive that a statement such as that is a crule genralisation, I do agree that there are a few no-talent politicans in the area but there are also some very fine examples of very talented politicans who live and work in the area.
• Stockton has one of the worst drug problems of any Northern town - housing estates like Hardwick and Bishopsgarth are rife with smack, speed and E. Hence the serious crime problems.
• Widest High Street in the UK - recently pedestrianised. Newly opened Tees Barage with canoe slalom - from £5 a training session.
• Shops: Everything you need can be found in Stockton's shops Castle Centre has its own indoor market.
• Teesside Park has loads of huge centres from a 14 screen Showcase cinema, Hollywood Bowl, Pizza Hut, Kansas Exchange, Burger King, Mcdonalds, Springs Fitness Centre, Morrisons, etc. etc. etc. All half a mile from Stockton town centre.
• The friction match was invented there and there is a commemorative plaque in the High Street.
• There are two plaques in the Stockton Town Hall, council chamber commemorating J. Walker, the inventor of the first friction match and Shetaton the famous designer of Sheraton furniture. There is also a plaque on the front of the very first railway passenger booking office in Britain.
• We have just set up a new karate club in Thorpe Thewles, Stockton. We need new members if the club is to survive. We practice non-contact, classical karate (non contact coz the movements are VERY powerful). It's cheap, with qualified instruction. Thorpe Thewles Parish hall, Every Thursday, 7-9pm.
• Never ever go to the Royal Exchange for a works Christmas Lunch as the service is awful and half of your party won't get anything to eat at all.
• The USS Endeavour is the Cleveland branch of the international Starfleet Command, a Star Trek fan club run by fans for fans. The USS Endeavour meets on the third Saturday of the month at the University College Stockton. At the meetings we show videos, hold quizzes and raffles. We support local charities and our main aim is to meet other people who like Star Trek and make friends.

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