For all the local information go to the main entry for Ullapool

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Dog Master (Member 10160482) on 2-Mar-2006
  Cheers Veeps - You & I had some fun. I'll catch you again?

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 2-Mar-2006
  Bye DM - there is too much small town in-fighting and anger down there for me now. I personally don't know how they all manage to live together in that environment. If does'nt happen where I live because if you were to make those sort of threats to others the chances are you would find yourself on the wrong end of a 12 bore coming out of the pub one night. The place is living 30 years in the past for sure.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Dog Master (Member 10160482) on 2-Mar-2006
  You have my Email if you want to get in touch. Look forward to hearing from you.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 4-Mar-2006
  Thanks DM. I am looking forward to a life now away from the meglomaniacs, control freaks and simply persons who spit out their dummies at the first thing they don't want, or don't like to hear. Alot of innocent people have given their lives to preserve freedom of speech in our society. Certain folks from Ulverston would do well to digest that fact.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 4-Mar-2006
  W

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 4-Mar-2006
  What a pompous man you are Veepee. You can't unwrite what you have already written. Its obvious, even to you, why you are hardly flavour of the month. Dog master keeps telling us all to get in touch with you. Why? You obviously have no respect for us. I don't know exactly what has gone on but you said on monday you were dogmaster and made it look like you were in a way that you couldn't have done without his help.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 4-Mar-2006
  So now you find we don't trust you. What else did you expect?

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 4-Mar-2006
  I do not want you to 'get in touch'. I consigned you to my 'recycle bin'. I have just pressed the button that says 'empty recycle bin'. You are history. End of story.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 4-Mar-2006
  Well thank fuck for that.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 4-Mar-2006
  I have absolutely no respect for anyone who uses the word 'control' in the context of 'controlling our own'. Of all the crap you have spouited recently that is what has really riled me. I recommend you pay a visit to Auswitch Birkenau some day - I guarantee you will never use that word in a human context again.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 5-Mar-2006
  I have already been.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 5-Mar-2006
  I have now finished chatting with you.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 5-Mar-2006
  Then I am disappointed you have learned nothing of what true freedom of opinion without persecution and what true freedom of speech without condemnation really means.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 5-Mar-2006
  By Jove.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 5-Mar-2006
  I'm a bit clueless as to how this has all happened really. Oh well.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 5-Mar-2006
  I

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 5-Mar-2006
  We all know what happened, but where from here?

• THIS MESSAGE BOARD WILL SELF DESTRUCT IN TEN SECONDS - PLEASE LEAVE THE BUILDING CAREFULLY. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 5-Mar-2006
  Who was Dog Master really? Was a difference of opinion on a messageboard really comparable to the events surrounding Auschwitz, as someone who's ancestors were killed in the holocaust and who can also spell it? At what stage did Veepee decide he hated us and who was the megolamaniac control freak? Did Dougie ever find a home? Who ended up forking out for the ill fated holiday cottage?

• Perhaps the next generation of messageboard marauders will find the key by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 5-Mar-2006
  Where would our curious clutch of characters end up? What compulsive recreation would they favour to fill the void left by our former idyll of idlerie? Perhaps we'll never know... *gazes profoundly at shelf above computer as credits roll to inappropriately comedic music*

• La Dernier Cri by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 5-Mar-2006
  And it was decreed that Jujube would, as ever, have THE LAST WORD! *goosesteps off with megolamaniac gleam in eye*

• Re: Not quite... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 5-Mar-2006
  THE GRAMMAR POLICE ARE ON THE CASE...
  IF YOU MIS-SPELL THEY'RE IN YOUR FACE!
  SO BEWARE, ALL YOU BENIGHTED SOULS
  NEVER ASK FOR WHOM THE BELL TOLLS
  IT TOLLED WHILE YOU WERE ASLEEP IN CLASS
  NOW THE GRAMMAR POLICE ARE GOING TO KICK YOUR ASS."

• Balls by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 5-Mar-2006
  Never mind mate - heres the last word - and have one for me.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 5-Mar-2006
  Make that "borls" then.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 5-Mar-2006
  Spitsbergen or Spitzbergen? chris@viola.dk

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 5-Mar-2006
  Its a Viking / Norwegish thing.

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 5-Mar-2006
  Or is that Norwegisch?

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 5-Mar-2006
  Somebody ask me if I care any more? Go on - just fuckin ask me....

• Re: A message in a bottle.... by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 15-Sep-2007
  Go on then Veeps - do ya care?

• Re: The Land Where Time Stands Still... by veepee (Member 10069595) on 1-Mar-2006
  Spooky even

• Re: Find Me A Home by sausage fingers (Member 10163900) on 14-Sep-2005
  well

• Re: Find Me A Home by the big ugly shark (Member 10152389) on 14-Sep-2005
  Hi sausage fingers!

• Re: Find Me A Home by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 16-Sep-2005
  Cool name!

• Re: Find Me A Home by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 18-Oct-2005
  You don't say much do you sausage fingers?

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  Explain!

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  How where when? You puttin me on?

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  Oh right - *understands!* sorry I was a bit slow there darling I was just about to drop everything and hold up a bank for the train fare. Here I am.

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  Sorry! I didn't mean to get your hopes up, its only a virtual holiday. Its just it was getting a bit draining with all those carping bastards. Thought it would be nice to have a breather.

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  Hopes up? Hmph, I was busy anyway. Yeah you're right. Nice place x

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  Gosh we shouldn't really be doing this you know! *releases hair and kicks shoes off* *feels saucy and exuberant and puts them back on again*

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  You were right actually, it is very nice to have a holiday from that other place. An ingenious machination my dear

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  Yes, a change is as good as a rest, I know this board doesnt get used much. So why not? I have been here on holiday and have relatives in the area.

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  Tell you what though, it is rather quiet - there doesn't seem to be an awful lot of interest occurring here really. Maybe I'm missing the point. *meditates, forcing self to enjoy the tranquility*

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  How are you? How is your life?

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  I know what you mean, it's like holidaying in a broom cupboard. I expect its only a matter of time before the locals come up the hill with pitchforks and burning torches.

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  Is there quite a long time delay on this? *voice echoes into eternity*

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  My life? It is like a football match between drabness and tension that always ends 0-0, with an unresponsive crowd.

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  I'm back in real time now.

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  I am fine though in myself, mon beau chéri, thank you for asking.

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  Good. You should write a novel, I love the way you describe things. You're very entertaining and imaginitive.

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  You flatter me, as Dog Master astutely pointed out you are the queen of the wood.

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  Ah well, I must leave for now. I'll see you back in the other.

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  We will meet again *evaporates into well appointed wardrobe*

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 25-Aug-2005
  Morning hot stuff - I've been called off on a business conference researching unemployment blackspots. I may see you back here after the weekend, hopefully. Keep the wine chilled x

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 25-Aug-2005
  Sorry I meant Solfest, my imagination ran away with me then

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 29-Aug-2005
  Hello? *calls upstairs, aflame with anticipation*

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 29-Aug-2005
  Oh well *crashes out in the bath*

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 31-Aug-2005
  *Shuffles into the bedroom of the now empty house and retires under the covers, stereo plays Young god by Swans. Do not disturb sign on the door.*

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is empty by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 1-Sep-2005
  *sees sign and walks out into the biting wind and lashing rain, shivering inside on a night more cruel than a child's laughter at a cripple begging in the street*

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 1-Sep-2005
  *sits on the harbour wall hoping to meet a knickerless tart with a heart who will understand and console me in my predicament as the grey, icy waves crash thunderously, roaring your name into the rocks*

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 2-Sep-2005
  *Drives down to the harbour in a car much faster than veepee's imaginary one. Pulls to the kerb and lifts the crying girl from the wall, holding her tight whilst raining a multitude of kisses on her, the solemn fool no longer alone in a bottle, realised the error of his capricious vanity. His self-engendered odyssey through stark and ultimately humiliating misery had driven her away. Could she ever forgive him*
  

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 2-Sep-2005
  *the girl's capacity for understanding human misery and loving the idiosyncrasies of another's weakness went beyond his estimation of her... no words were required. None would ever be. Behind her whore's laugh and merry eyes her heart was faithful to her dreams of him...but the only dream that really meant anything at all was of his happiness, wherever and with whomever he found it.*

• Re: Jujube your holiday home is ready. by lennon hitler (Member 10202387) on 26-Feb-2007
  FISHMAN, YOU ARE A TOTAL AND UTTER CUNT!!!

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by the big ugly shark (Member 10152389) on 15-Aug-2005
  That's me sat on the harbour wall with no knickers on.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by the big ugly shark (Member 10152389) on 18-Aug-2005
  I'm feeling horny, my nipples are hardening.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 19-Aug-2005
  Furryboots are ye fae? Weirdo.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 24-Aug-2005
  They're worse than our lot aren't they? Only I think we do it with more style to be honest

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  Is Dougie coming?

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Big "Jock" McTavish (Member 10158385) on 24-Aug-2005
  Aye I'm here - an' I'm gaun fae a swallae I think, it's the dogs airse on here...I thought ah wiz in Wick fae a moment. Theres naebody tae even threaten wi violence or nothin, ken? Its shite.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 10-Sep-2005
  Hello Jujube, Have you fallen out with me?

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 10-Sep-2005
  Why would I fall out with you?

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 11-Sep-2005
  I'm not sure, "something weird", "Togingoggle" I'm coming up to visit the town at the centre of the universe shortly, T'would be nice to see you.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 11-Sep-2005
  Forget Toggers - yes PLEASE DO!!! I promise I'll try not to rip yr clothes off. I would love to meet you.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 11-Sep-2005
  Sorry Fishman I was drunk when I wrote that. You can't pay any attention to my promises when I'm in my cups.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 14-Sep-2005
  I am off to the mediterranean tomorrow, so my postings may be erratic, I will see you soon crimson lips.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 16-Sep-2005
  Lucky you!!! Have a great time x

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 16-Sep-2005
  By the way, is that a posh way of saying you're going to Spain?

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by clammy lammy (Member 10147337) on 26-Sep-2005
  It wasn't even the mediterranean was it? Hi Jujube.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 28-Sep-2005
  Now I'm REALLY confused!!!

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 29-Sep-2005
  Clammy was a tool I used when I was attempting to revive the notice board back in February when it was on it's knees. I was too lazy to do much with him afterwards. Sorry!

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Doktor Vibes (Member 10161783) on 2-Oct-2005
  I know exactly how you feel clammy lammy. I had written a story about my reason for existence, all about how I was born in rural Germany, had a loveless existence in childhood and became obsessed with marionettes. I then had a terrifying experience in which I discovered that once I had given them personalities, they began to take on a life of their own...

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Doktor Vibes (Member 10161783) on 2-Oct-2005
  I was kicked out of medical college in Vienna after I had developed some radical theories concerning quantum physics and the human ability to affect living and non-living matter through the flow of energy to subatomic particles. If that is possible, I thought, why can humans not give animation to matter as well through thoughtwaves...or "vibes"?

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Doktor Vibes (Member 10161783) on 2-Oct-2005
  My derogatory nickname of Doktor Vibes began then, but I began to like it when I gained access to University in Paris (through falsely refuting my earlier claims and blaming them on the pressure of academic life) in the 1960s, where I became a well-known "acid king".

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Doktor Vibes (Member 10161783) on 2-Oct-2005
  After a series of adventures in which I also discovered I was immortal after falling in love (graphically obviously) with a Berlin prostitute or two and finding myself immune to syphilis, I kind of wandered ever since...until I discovered knowhere noticeboards...

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Doktor Vibes (Member 10161783) on 2-Oct-2005
  I then created Jujube & Co., and to cut a long story short THE LUNATICS WERE RUNNING THE ASYLUM! Something had to be done! Yes, I thought, I must kill them all! That is what I must do! Then, in a fit of megolamania, I considered claiming to have created not just them, but all the other characters too! Yes...even you.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 2-Oct-2005
  In the end he knew I wouldn't be able to shut up after he'd killed me though, and it all fell flat. It was a desperate measure really, to curb my habit. Every day I think of ways to go out with a bang and never get round to doing it. Also I realised no-one would probably enjoy my tale (it was circa Ralphmania.) So I just abandoned the whole thing!

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Jujube (Member 10133548) on 2-Oct-2005
  It made for a fun evening's manic scribbling though...quite a good yarn really with the embellishments. Don't know what to do with him now. Clammy lammy was very convincing though, I never would have guessed!

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by the big ugly shark (Member 10152389) on 4-Oct-2005
  That was a grim time, I thought about leaving the board back then, a step too far I feel, but what about Yuccamucca?

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by Big "Jock" McTavish (Member 10158385) on 4-Oct-2005
  His name's Colin, he lives in Kent...you may have met him years ago I don't know. To be honest I've got a feeling he is Miss.Togingoggle but because he's changed gender theres no way I can get on his case without seeming like Bindon clutching at straws. I'm almost 100% sure its him, I can just tell.

• Re: You should look inside my kitchen Its Crackers by El Diablo (Member 10159134) on 7-Oct-2005
  I don't know what has brought you to this conclusion, but if you look at the member numbers Miss. Togingoggle 171280 & Yuccamucca 178849 it would seem Togs was around long before Yucca. Once I was convinced Dog master was Minty. The night before Dog Master appeared I sent Minty an email telling him to have a look at the message board, but I didn't think that for long.

• Re: LOOKING FOR SOMEWHERE TO LIVE IN ULLAPOOL by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  Try this www.dolphinullapool.co.uk/Tariff.html

• Re: UFO Sightings recorded information line by tony kinsella (Member 10003605) on 6-Feb-2004
  Saw a flying kangaroo last sunday night ,if that's any good ot you?

• Re: UFO Sightings recorded information line by Fishman (Member 10145553) on 24-Aug-2005
  couple of mermaids in Loch Broom as well. sd

• Re: Clocks and Isles by kezza (Member 10101247) on 18-Jul-2003
  The Fowler Memorial Clock, was erected in the memory of Sir John Fowler - of Braemore, (which is near the head of Loch Broom)
  He was a chief engineer, and was in charge of the construction of many railways,including the metropoliton underground system, and he designed the Forth Rail Bridge.

• Re: Trying to Find: by Campbell (Member 10077840) on 14-Sep-2002
  Oh yeah, 1 of the girls works in the bakers opposite costcutter at the weekends i think. SHe has blondish hair. If any1 goes there could you tell her to get me at- DucatiCam@Aol.com, it would be greatly appreciated. Cheers